HOW TO TALK TO GIRLS | NEVER RUN OUT OF THINGS TO SAY | KEEP A CONVERSATION GOING
How to Get a Girl to Talk to You
Talking to a girl is only half the battle. You also have to get her to talk to you! Fortunately, it’s a lot easier to get a girl to talk to you than you might think. First, you’ll want to get her attention. Then, you'll need to find a way to interact with her. After you've made contact, you can use an easy conversation starter that’s sure to get a response.
Getting Her Attention
Take care of your hygiene.Smelling good will make everyone feel more comfortable around you, including the girl you like. Keep yourself clean by showering daily and using personal care products, such as soap, shampoo, and deodorant.
- Take a shower in the morning.
- Wear deodorant.
- Consider wearing cologne, if you have some. However, don't apply too much!
- Make sure your clothes are clean and wrinkle-free.
Dress to impress.Wearing the right clothes can get you noticed. Your clothes should make you look your best and match the occasion. Choose clothing that fits you well and shows off your personality. Pick something that makes you feel confident, as that confidence will show in how you carry yourself.
- Consider where you're going when choosing the perfect look. For example, you might look handsome in a suit, but you'll look out of place if you wear that to school. Similarly, you might look out of place at a rock concert if you're wearing a preppy golf shirt.
- For example, you might choose a t-shirt that features a band you and the girl both like, or you could copy a trendy look worn by your favorite singer.
Show your talents and interests with your clothes, speech, and actions.This helps boost your confidence and get her attention. Write down a few awesome things about yourself, then show them off at school. You can do that by joining a club or team, choosing clothes that represent those things, or talking about them.
- Ask yourself questions like these: Are you smart? Do you play a sport? Can you play an instrument? What are your hobbies?
- For example, you could bring your guitar to school and play a few tunes before school to show off your musical talent. Alternatively, pass out flyers for an upcoming show your band is doing or enter the talent show.
- If you play a school sport, you could wear your school issued sports t-shirt, if you're allowed to. Otherwise, wear a shirt that represents that sport, such as your favorite team jersey.
- If you're an artist, you might paint or draw on your shoes, pants, jacket, or t-shirt. Wear it to school with pride!
- If you're a skilled programmer, you might join the computer science club and go to competitions. Show off your awards at school and wear your team shirt to class.
Be yourself when you're around her.It's tempting to try to be someone you're not to attract someone you like, but this doesn't work. Not only are you misrepresenting yourself, you'll likely come across as false. Being your authentic self will attract the right person to you. If it's not her, that's okay.
- Stay true to your beliefs. Don't agree with everything she says if you think she's wrong.
- Do what makes you comfortable. For example, don't act like you're outgoing if you're normally more introverted.
- Stay true to your own interests. For example, don't pretend to love her favorite band if you actually hate it. However, it's okay to ask her for more information about what interests her. For example, you can ask her about her photography hobby, but don't pretend like you're also a photographer if it's not true.
Join a club she’s in.This will give you an opportunity to hang out with her in a casual social setting. Before you join, make sure that you’re knowledgeable about the club’s subject.
- Go to the club’s meetings and participate in any social events.
- Don’t approach her right away. Instead, try to participate in the club activities and let your meeting happen naturally.
Reach out on social media.Follow her on social media, then send her a direct message. Keep your message casual. For example, send her a meme that reminds you of something that happened in class that day.
- Write, “Lol, this meme reminds me Ms. Ray today.”
- You might want to send an introductory message before you send her a meme. What you choose to send first will depend on how well you know each other. For example, you might start with the meme if you're classmates who talk sometimes. However, you might want to introduce yourself first if you only know each other through mutual friends.
- Wait for her to respond before you send another message. If you send several messages at once, she will likely find it annoying.
Connect through mutual friends.You can ask your mutual friends to introduce you, or you can set up a group activity that will include the girl you want to talk to. Your friends may also be able to give you insight into what she likes.
- For example, invite your friends to go bowling and make sure that the girl gets an invite, as well.
Walk up to her directly.The best time to do this is before school or during lunch. You might also approach her during an activity you're both enrolled in, such as an after school club. You’ll show that you’re confident if you walk up to her without hesitation. Smile as you make your approach so that she knows you’re friendly.
- Confidence will make you more appealing!
- Know what you are going to say before you walk up to her.
- Don't interrupt a conversation she's having with someone else.
- It's also not a good idea to walk up to her between classes or when she's walking purposefully. In this case, she might be annoyed that you're interrupting her when she's trying to get where she needs to go.
Make eye contact to get her attention.Try to get her attention when you see her, especially when it might be a good time to talk, such as during lunch. Eye contact both captures her attention and shows that you are confident. Once you catch her eyes, you can start talking to her.
Starting a Conversation
Wait until she's not busy.If she's doing something or talking to someone else, then it's not a good time to try to talk to her. Interrupting what she's doing will likely annoy her, making her less receptive to having a conversation. Additionally, she'll likely be distracted. Instead, wait until she's free.
- For example, don't try to talk to her if you see her reviewing her notes before class starts. A better time might be while she's waiting in the lunch line.
Tell her a joke.Showing off your sense of humor is a great way to get her talking. After she laughs at your joke, keep the conversation going. You could tell another joke, or bring up a topic you know interests her.
- If you don’t think you’re funny, look up a few jokes online. Just make sure the ones you choose aren’t dirty jokes, cruel, hurtful, or otherwise inappropriate.
- For example, “Have you ever heard of the claustrophobic astronaut? He just needed a little space.”
Request a simple favor.Stick to something small, such as a copy of her biology notes or to borrow a pencil. This will spark an interaction between you two.
- Say, “I was absent yesterday. Could I take a photo of your bio notes?”
- After she responds, try to keep the conversation going. If you can’t, that’s okay! Wait 1-2 days, then try to talk to her again.
Ask her a basic question.Stick to topics that are appropriate for someone you don’t know well, such as school, mutual interests, popular movies and TV shows, and food. Your topic should be casual, such as a question about movies rather than a question about politics. Start by asking her a passing question about a factual topic. If that goes well, try asking her about herself.
Give her a casual but sincere compliment.Don’t focus too much on her physical appearance. Instead, point out what you like about her style, talents, or academic performance.
- You could say, “Haha, your shirt is so funny,” “Great job in Friday’s game,” “That was a great answer in class today,” or “Cool backpack.”
- After she says, “Thank you,” try to extend the conversation with a follow-up comment.
Actively listen to her response.Look at her while she’s talking, and nod along to show you’re listening. Give occasional affirmative responses, such as “Uh-huh” or “That’s crazy.” Before you respond, summarize what she’s said.
- For example, say, “Wow, it sounds like you’re an expert on the Marvel Universe.”
Express interest in what she has to say.She’s more likely to keep talking if she knows you’re interested. In addition to actively listening, you should ask her additional questions and make comments to show you’re interested.
QuestionHow to get a girl to talk when chatting with her on social media and you already know each other?wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerSend her a funny meme and wait for her response. You can also try asking her an open-ended question based on her listed interests. For example, "What did you think about the latest season of 13 Reasons Why?" Give her time to respond before sending more messages. Otherwise, she'll get annoyed.Thanks!
QuestionHow do you talk to a girl and get her to like you in that conversation?wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerTry the tips provided above to get her attention and start a conversation. When you talk to her, just be yourself!Thanks!
QuestionWhat do you do if they adamantly refuse to talk to you? I don't even get a "go away" or "you're creepy."wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerIf she doesn't want to talk to you, respect her decision. Sometimes people just don't want to talk, and that's okay. You've likely encountered people you didn't want to talk to, so try to remember that. Instead, try to focus your efforts on someone who does want to talk to you.Thanks!
QuestionHow do I get a girlfriend?wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerFollow the steps above to get a girl's attention. After you start talking, ask her to hang out in a casual setting, such as at a local yogurt shop. You might even invite a few friends for a group hang out, at first. After you've been on a few outings, ask her if she'll be your girlfriend.Thanks!
QuestionOne of my best friends stopped talking to me, and I want her to talk to me again. What do I do?wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerBe the first to reach out. Send her a nice message on social media, such as a photo of you 2 together with a note about how much you miss her. Alternatively, invite her to sit with you at lunch. Let her know that you miss her and want to make up.Thanks!
QuestionHow do I talk to a girl who I find it awkward to talk to?wikiHow Staff EditorStaff AnswerStart with social media at first. This will open a door to communication that you can expand to in-person talking when you're ready.Thanks!
- If a girl likes you, she'll mention you around her friends. Talk to her friends and see if she likes you, but don't be nosy.
- Don’t tease her!
- Just be yourself!
- Just talk to her and try to be her friend.
- Don’t touch a girl without her permission. This will make her uncomfortable and may get you in trouble.
- Don’t follow the girl around, as this can make her uncomfortable.
- Avoid inappropriate topics when talking to her.
- Drop the pickup lines. They can be a big turn-off.
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